Arnette Pilfer Sunglasses - Polarized - $99.95

Toss on the Arnette Pilfer Sunglasses and push over the walls of your cubicle. Highly impact-resistant polarized lenses will protect your eyes from the shower of particle board splinters. Stroll casually down the alley of cubes, walk up to your boss's office, and shake that man's hand. He gave you the sunglasses as part of your generous severance package after all, so the least you can do is slap hands with the man ... considering that you haven't washed that hand in a week. - $99.95